I hate myself
I so hate myself. Everywhere I go, anywhere I go, I create trouble. Is it because of my character, my personality; Or is God against me. I just don't get it.
When I was Secondary One, even in the early months of the year, I already had problems with my Band Seniors, that's why I left.
In the same year, I had big problems with my form-teacher and led to Mr Wee which my mother had to come to school. My mother was very supporting though, and always spoke to Mr Wee with sarcasm, like what he always do. And this resulted me with a 3 month break from school.
That 3 month holiday wasn't good either, no friends, no one for me. I was totally isolated at home, didn't even step out of my house for that holiday! Trouble with friends.
That's just one year! And my trouble-doings make a list.
This year wasn't that good either. Last monday, I came 'late' for school, had excuse letter but the OM didn't take it. Kinda quarelled with him. Again! I created trouble.
After doing his detention, I rushed to choir without even having lunch. I went in, Ms Yee chased me out. Waited 2 hours for choir to end, so that I could talk to her. What did I get? "I don't want to see you, go away." My character killed her.
Why Is It Always Me?! I Just HATE Myself So Much... But my Character say no sorry. I hate myself.
posted by Zack Ng at 9:56 PM
10 Comments:
Relax guy..sometyms soul searching is important n oso useful..i find ur writing good..u express ur feelings..although i dont noe who u r..through ur writing ..u sound nice..look 4 a counciler if u juz dunno wad 2 do....:)Take Care!=)
4:24 PM
...because it's not ALWAYS you, and neither can it be ONLY you. JIA YOU!&thanks for wishing me happy birthday that time. I really appreciated it! xD
Keep posting, someone's bound to read it. =)
7:48 PM
Are u in the stage of depression???
consult some doctor or like that, sometimes it happened with me but i think u should try to come out from past.
3:25 AM
I know how you feel,
because it's the same here.
10:36 PM
3 months break from school? Were you suspended, or what? What the hell did the school do that for?
4:14 PM
3 months break from school? Were you suspended, or what? What the hell did the school do that for?
4:14 PM
Just be yourself. It doesn't matter what others think. They are not you. You are. Maybe it was just a bad day for everyone. I know I've been in your shoes, so also remember that you are never alone!
12:58 AM
I was a troubled teen too, but for me, it was "finding a place to stand" in our society.
I hate society. I hate societal views on teens and how they think they know so much about teens when they actually don't.
But don't worry... those adults who brushed you off like that probably have their hung ups and issues too.
Everyone has issues.
Just like you and me.
Instead of being angry with the people around you, learn more about why people react that way towards you. What did you do or say or act that made people around you behave that way towards you?
Do you see a pattern of dislike towards you? Then you should try to spot the pattern which is on you.
Love yourself even when others dislike or hate you. Never live life for others but yourself. Even though how they feel and think about you matters sometimes, you should never live your life or change for them..
Of course, if you feel that you want to change for the better, it will be difficult and discouraging at first because you would need them to acknowledge your presence and your desire to change.
You haven't found the friend who would love you unconditionally, despite your bad points. Give yourself some time. I may not be much older than you are, so I can safely say that you still have a long way ahead of you.
Don't give up. Have faith in yourself. We are born alone, and we die alone.
If they do not make you a better person, ignore them. If they make your lives miserable, ignore them. Do what you feel is best for you, do what you feel is right for you and live for yourself.
From:
someone who is presently using the blog layout you designed.
4:41 PM
Haha. Depression. You must read today's mind your body article about depression or something. :D
8:56 PM
Boy....you have to chill...take it easy....is called depression anybody has it...you have to relax a lil'bit..and things will be cool. You don't have to worry..maybe is your personality....sometimes i feel like i am nothing than a big problem...but if i think a second...i realise that this is me...maybe i am little crazy...but is me!!! think about it.. maybe you are just different. you are cool
12:23 AM
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