Saturday, June 09, 2007

I hate myself, once again.

It was a very bad day, one of the worse day of my life. Outside you see me smile, but I am dying inside, without you.

But now I know one thing, everyone is making use of her innocence. Him, me, her friends, everyone. She's indeed blur and always don't know that she's doing the wrong thing. I'd just hate myself, even though I do not know it, but I completely used her innocence to get close to her, always lying to even myself.

She changed completely after reading my previous post. Can't be blamed. But its not only that she's changed, she's sad. Fuck myself, I deserve death. If I'd not blogged, everything would turn out fine now, just that I would always be her good-friend. Now she's got another trouble, and she lost another comforter. Its a lose-lose situation, and all because of me. I hate myself and I hate blogging.

I will always remain that good-friend of yours. I am sorry.

You could not see my sharp teeth,
You could not see my big and round eyes,
You could not see my large nose,
Without knowing,
I became your big bad Wolf.
But still, I could not eat you up.
And now everything just got so bad.
I would die, and you would moan for your Granny in my stomach,
All this may just be expressions,
But its real sorrows.
I don't know how to revert all of this,
But I will always be that good-friend of yours.
Now I realised I was making use of your innocence all-along,
I am sorry.


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